again and again ....

"People, you shouldn't lose hope. NEVER. Never be judgemental towards yourself. It is just a shameful thing to be like one. Where the hell your pride is?? It is true that the world is just unfair sometimes but at least be JUST to yourself, to your life. Remember that, strong wall shakes but never collapse. Build that confidence in you and keep on moving and trying your very best. Losing hope is just for the losers. Prove it to them that you're someone in this world and not just anybody useless. Your spirit, your desire are what made you.."

~This is how my convincing speech looks like...~ (tak sangka dalam pada panik tahap dewa time tu pon aku boleh tulis speech panjang ni..ingatkan aku akan tulis 2 ayat je.. -.-)

so the task given by miz nash was, "make a short speech that can make the world hear and listen to you(your speech)" upon hearing this,,, my heart sank.. 0.0 man!! berderau terus darah.. dah la kene present! memang tak de idea langsung nak tulis pasal ape.. sebab panik tahap dewa! till then i'm hoping and praying to Allah that she would not call my name to be in front. cuak! but...
things just not turn up like i wished..
too bad.. kene panggil jugak.. reda walaupun hakikatnya memang langsung tak sedia..
miz nash cakap speech aku is more to encourage people.. hmm... boleh la tu kot..

jadi begitulah seterusnya, hari-hari aku berlalu everytime ade kelas Speech Communication. denga je pekataan speech tu rasa macam haisshh.. nigtmare.. igauan kot. Cuak! penat kalau slalu sangat macam ni... i wonder when the time will come, me, being a good speaker like that fortunate girl in our class..
Speech com. is indeed a fun and enjoyable subject to learn sebab memang tak blaja sangat pon n seronok bile tgok orang present, just promote n expose diri kat depan kelas n khalayak je but, yeah, when it comes to speak in front tu lah yang aku fail.. rase cam nak lari je..
i remember those days, upper form(tgb), oral BI or BM, aku akan mengharapkan semua classmate aku tido, so then i can deliver my speech calmly .. haha.. thanks to those people (classmate 14) yg letak kepala atas meja bila aku buat oral kat depan.. really appreciate that effortless support.. haha..trimass ;)

for me, its fine to talk in front of those people yg aku tak kenal... because u just dont know what is that about her/him(me) and they dont know anything about u.. so fair and square kan..?

so the thing that haunts me now is....
Introductory Speech hari selasa ni! being the third speaker pulak tu.. memang dah agak no 3 tu lucky number aku when it comes to introductory speech.. since 1st semester lagi..
really need someone that can encourage and make me calm now..
the topic chosen by miz nash for me was " GIRL OF STEEL" the question is, 'am i that strong??'
*sigh*
ok then, i'll try my very best...
Ya ALLAH..berilah hambaMU ini ketenangan.. 

'hidup ini tak selalunya indah'